Series: Unwrapping Your Spiritual Gift
#8: The Gifts of Spiritual Qualities – Hospitality
Genesis 18:1-14 and Hebrews 13:2 (NLT)
By John Gill ~ July 23, 2023
only first verse, stop at the end of these lyrics:
Consider yourself at home - Consider yourself one of the family
I've taken to you so strong - It's clear - We're going to get along
Consider yourself well in - Consider yourself part of the furniture
There isn't a lot to spare - Who cares? - Whatever we've got, we share!
If it should chance to be - We should see - Some harder days
Empty-larder days - Why grouse?
Always a chance we'll meet - Somebody to foot the bill - Then the drinks are on the house!
Consider yourself my mate - We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration, we can state - Consider yourself - One of us! 1
This morning, we are continuing our look at the Spiritual Gifts the Holy Spirit gives to God’s people. In case you haven’t noticed yet, today subject is “Hospitality.” And right off the bat, we have a slight problem – “hospitality” is not included in any of the biblical lists of “Spiritual Gifts.” Is it a “gift” or not? Since it isn’t included in Paul’s lists, some folks argue that hospitality isn’t a Spiritual Gift. And yet, the theme of hospitality is mentioned over and over again throughout scripture. There are numerous biblical examples, and certainly hospitality has been practiced throughout the many centuries of the Christian Church. For those reasons, I consider it a Spiritual Gift – I don’t believe Paul meant his lists to be exhaustive. Maybe, he just took it for granted that the people of God would automatically be hospitable to strangers.
As I’ve mentioned in previous sermons, we are dividing the Spiritual Gifts into three categories: Spiritual Qualities, Spiritual Roles, and Spiritual Expressions. We have begun with the Spiritual Qualities: things like love, wisdom, generosity, mercy, and so forth. These are qualities that all Christians possess to some degree, yet some folks have been blessed with a double dose. All Christians are commanded to be hospitable to others. As Paul writes to the Romans (chapter 12), “Extend hospitality to strangers.” But those with the Gift of Hospitality don’t have to be commanded to be gracious. It is in their nature. To them, it’s just as the famous humorist of the last century, Will Rogers, said, “Strangers are just friends I haven’t met yet.” Or as Dodger sang to Oliver, “Consider yourself at home - Consider yourself one of the family.”
The definition of the Gift of Hospitality is this: “The gift to provide open homes and a warm welcome for all those in need of food or lodging; graciousness of spirit.”
In the Bible, there are countless examples of folks opening their homes to others. In our first lesson, Abraham and Sarah followed middle-eastern customs by graciously receiving three strangers, unaware that they were actually angels sent by God. The widow of Zarephath opened her home to the Prophet Elijah. Another couple actually built a guest room onto their house where the Prophet Elisah could sleep. The siblings, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus provided lodging for Jesus in their home in Bethany whenever he visited Jerusalem. Traveling missionaries in the Book of Acts stayed in countless homes across Asia Minor as honored guests. And even in the early days of the Methodist revival, Circuit Riders regularly stayed in the homes of the people they ministered to.
Of course, most of us today welcome our family and friends to stay with us whenever they are in the area. We may even occasionally welcome a stranger into our home. Does that mean we have the Gift of Hospitality? Not necessarily.
If hospitality is a command of the Christian life, how are we to distinguish between just being a gracious host and the gift of hospitality? There are certain characteristics of one who has the gift. Those with the gift of hospitality:
1. Open their homes joyfully, making guests feel welcome and wanted.
In First Peter 4:9, we read, “Be hospitable with one another without complaining.” Have you ever stayed at someone’s home and felt they really didn’t want you there? When a stranger (or even a relative) comes to stay with you, how do you feel? Guests can sense when they aren’t truly welcome.
I know that I don’t have the gift of hospitality. Sure, I enjoy when family come to visit (for a brief time), but strangers in the house cause me stress. Maybe I don’t complain about the disruption of routine, but their presence makes me uncomfortable. I’m sorry to admit that my guests can probably sense it. I can identify with Donald Coggan, the former Archbishop of Canterbury, who quipped: “The art of hospitality is to make guests feel at home when you wish they were."
Yet, I have known many folks in the congregations I have served who thoroughly enjoy having total strangers in their home. In fact, those with this gift are never happier than when they are playing host to others. You see the joy on their faces! They are pleased that they can bring joy to their guest. Visitors in the homes of those gifted with hospitality know they are welcome and wanted. These hosts could sing to their guest: “Consider yourself well in - Consider yourself part of the furniture
There isn't a lot to spare - Who cares? - Whatever we've got, we share!”
2. The second characteristic of those with this gift of hospitality is that they accept and love their guests – just as they are.
Most of us have an unwritten guest-list… those we are willing to welcome into our homes – and others who are not. The criteria for who makes which list varies: favorite and less-favorite family members, friends, co-workers, acquaintances, strangers; based on race or ethnicity, age, life-style, sexual orientation, or handicapping condition. Those with the Gift welcome ALL, and accept each person just as they are – warts and all.
I heard a story that vividly makes this point: There was a woman on the east coast who was anticipating the joy of welcoming her son home from the War in Vietnam. He was flying back to the States, and landed in California. He called his mother from a pay phone to say he wanted to bring an army buddy home with him. She said, “Sure.” Her son added, “But you need to know that he has only one arm and one leg.” The mother said, “Well, O.K.” But there is one more thing you should know – his face is terribly disfigured – he is hard to look at.” There was a pause. The mother said, “That’s all right – it will only be a few days.” The son corrected her: “You don’t understand – I’m bringing him home to live with us.”
She hung up. The police called her the next morning. The son had committed suicide. He was the unwelcomed guest coming to live with her.
That woman must never had learned the wisdom from the Musical, “If it should chance to be - We should see - Some harder days - Empty-larder days - Why grouse?”
Those with the Gift of Hospitality do not judge or try to change their guest. They gladly accept the “harder days, empty-larder days” that may come with opening their homes and their hearts to others. Those gifted with hospitality welcome people just as they are – and in so doing, they show their guest that he or she is loved.
3. The third characteristic of those with this gift is that they make their guest feel more than welcome, they see them as family.
As we sang in that passage from the Gospel of St. Oliver: “Consider yourself at home - Consider yourself one of the family.” People with the gift have a knack for making their guests feel “at home.” Now, I’m not talking about being the “hostess with the mostess,” putting on the dog, pulling out the best china, the fancy soaps, and the best hand-towels. If you worry too much about appearances, you aren’t really concerned about your guest – you are actually concerned about yourself (pride) – about what your guest will think of you. In Oliver we sang, “we don’t want to have no fuss…” I’m talking about making your guest feel so “at home” that they “belong.” As Dodger sang, “Consider yourself part of the furniture.”
Those with the gift of hospitality focus on the needs of the other, not on the self. They will try to make their home pleasant and comfortable (of course), - but if the floors are not mopped or they have to serve left-overs, they won’t feel embarrassed. Jesus frequently stayed at the home of Martha, Mary, and Lazarus. And you may recall the story of one visit when Martha was frantically busy fussing in the kitchen, but Mary was leisurely sitting at Jesus’ feet, in conversation with him about spiritual matters. Two very different approaches to “how to hostess” – but, Mary had the Gift of Hospitality – she didn’t treat him as a guest, but as family. So, true hospitality is more than just welcoming people into your home. It is making people feel “at home.”
So, people with the Gift of Hospitality make folks feel “at home” by 1) making them feel welcome (wanted); 2) accepting them just as they are (loved); and 3) making them feel “part of the family” (included).
“Fine,” so you might say, “we are just talking about being gracious. But is it a ‘spiritual gift?’”
We have said that the purpose of Spiritual Gifts is to glorify God and build up the Church. That means that Hospitality becomes a spiritual gift – when it is applied to the Church!
Hospitality is ESSENTIAL to the church. It’s so essential at Tomoka that we have the verse we read from Hebrews this morning plastered across the wall in the narthex.
We are called to welcome and extend hospitality to all people who may come through our doors.
So, the test of Hospitality is this:
Do we joyously open God’s house to strangers, making ALL people feel welcome and wanted?
Do we accept and love people just the way they are, or do we have our own “guest list of whose in and who’s out?”
Do we expect people to change or “clean up their act” before they are fully welcomed here?
Do we strive to make new folks feel they are “part of the family?” or do we send out signals that, if you are a newcomer or “different” from us, you can’t be “one of us” - until we let you “join the club?”
I believe the gift of hospitality is even more vital in the church than it is in our homes! Now-a-days, most strangers no longer need to find shelter in our private homes. But that doesn’t mean there are no strangers out there. There are lots of “strangers needing “a place to belong,” strangers who are simply “the friends we haven’t yet met.” In this fractured and fracturing society, where politics and prejudice wants to make “strangers” of all of us, the church ought to be THE ONE PLACE in America where genuine Hospitality abounds!
The United Methodist Church, especially as we move into the future, needs to boldly declare to our culture our motto, that we have “Open Hearts, Open Minds, and Open Doors” – that we are a safe place of gracious hospitality - where all are wanted, all are welcome, and all are family. We want every person who walks through those doors to know they are loved here – by God, and by us. May they hear, at Tomoka, the welcome that Dodger sang to Oliver:
“Consider yourself my mate - We don't want to have no fuss
For after some consideration, we can state - Consider yourself –
One of us!”
1 Leslie Bricusse. “Oliver” Broadway Musical.
© 2023 by John B. Gill, III